The Facebook News

CONNECTICUT – There is not enough vodka in the world, this according to Bethlehem resident Krista Modine. This news has yet to be confirmed as calls to the Absolut company were not immediately returned.

BOSTON – Tina and Jason Maroon are now friends with Jason Marecki. The basis for this relationship has not been made public and more information will emerge as officials continue their investigation.

NEW YORK – Meghann Pfeffer Tucker is making her daughter Riley’s favorite dinner tonight… baked salmon, sweet potatoes and spinach. Whether or not the toddler cleared her plate is unknown at this time.

In a related story Mark Pfeffer is considering  eating hipster granny glasses like they were going out of style in attempt to find out if they would actually go out of style. Health officials advised against this behavior. Pfeffer could not be reached for comment.

LITCHFIELD – Erin Peck Maziarz and Lesley Budny have re-connected through Facebook and both parties appear happy. Where this relationship will lead has yet to be determined.

MANCHESTER – Ashlie Dranginis reportedly spent some  quality time with Zach and Lauren Thursday afternoon. It is unclear if the trio has spent quality time together in the past or will in the future.

TORRINGTON –  Reports coming out of Granby suggest Meagan Anderson does not have to work again until Tuesday.  Anderson would not confirm reports that she will be spending her mini-vacation in Kentucky.

TORRINGTON – It has been confirmed that Bryan Grustas likes Sky Top Lanes. Sources close to Grustas report that he is an avid bowler and spends eight to 10 hours a week at the East Main Street establishment.

COLORADO – In a shocking development Rick Kliminowki has created fire. Details to follow.

BREAKING NEWS: Reports out of Torrington indicate Gordon Falcetti’s  leg training went well. More details as they become available.

NEW YORK – Chris Kostecki was seen looking toward the horizon early Thursday. What he saw has yet to be reported.

CONNECTICUT – Several reports coming out of  Taftville indicate that Stacy Ritchotte, former girlfriend of Eric Lambert, is making a sad face. The reason for this startling development is currently under investigation.

LITCHFIELD – It appears that when Carrie Newton Copeland has the music then she has a place to go. Exactly what music she has and where she is going remains unclear as of press time. In similar news, Copeland has recently become friends with Keith Brown, Angela Lynn Joray and Scott Dimenstein. Whether or not they too have music and a place to go in undetermined.

TORRINGTON – Radio DJ Amy Ferarotti was recently tagged in an album featuring photos from The Producers, currently in production at the historic Warner Theater. It is unclear if the tagged photos were authorized by Ferarotti.

BOSTON – Former Northfield resident Jill Coffey has reportedly written a letter to writers of the hit TV show Lost, telling them to get their Sh*t together in an effort to ensure a satisfying conclusion to the May 23 Series Finale. Writers of Lost did not return calls seeking comment.

TORRINGTON – Kendra Powell has revealed she has no tolerance for stupid people, saying they “piss her off.”

That’s the Facebook News for Friday May 14. Goodnight America.

  

 

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One Response to “The Facebook News”

  1. Bryant Gumble Says:

    Classic.

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