My Perfect Life

“I have but one dream in life…To achieve my many goals.” Homer Simpson

I live in a modest house in a small town. Someplace like Litchfield or Harwinton. I have two kids, a boy named John after my grandfather but we call him Jack, after my mother, Jackie. I also have a daughter. Her name is Mikelina (mick-uh-leena) named after my great-grandmother. We call her Mickey, like the mouse.

My wife is 5-5. She is a brunette and she is wicked smart. She handles the finances because she enjoys that kind of stuff. She makes the house look nice by hanging up paintings that she does herself. She also maintains a small garden outback, because she likes that kind of stuff.

I don’t have a full time job because I won WIN FOR LIFE and I don’t feel like working. However, just to stay busy I put in a few hours each week at the movie theater. It’s really cool because I get to see movies for free. Thursday night’s are the best. After work, rather than come home, Im allowed the watch midnight showings of films due to come out on Friday. All employees are welcome to do so but most leave. I’m usually alone in the theater and I like it this way because it really is the only time I have to myself.

Being a rich lotto winner I’m allowed a few perks that would be otherwise unaffordable. I have season tickets to the Yankees. I host a weekly poker game at the house, usually attended by anywhere from 4 to 10 people, depending on whose wife will let them out that night.

Jamie is still the queen of Halloween while the Jewetts hold the annual Christmas Party. We usually travel for the Fourth of July but come new Years Eve I throw what is always refered to as “The Party of the Year.”  Sometimes I get a DJ, other times a party band to perform an acoustic set in the garage. Most years though I just make a mix cd.

Of course I still have Andy but we bought him a girlfriend, another Puggle named Alice.

This was supposed to be the year where I travel the globe with Tai, Joe and Jewett, using my wealth to gain us access into the word’s most prestigious setback games, held on all seven continents in Top Secret Locations.  But that will have to wait till next year at the earliest. My smoking hot wife is pregnant again….with twins.


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